Témoignages

“I have noticed one thing in my life, which is that my physical and practical life depends on my life of prayer. When I say physical life, I mean my relationships with others, my activities at home and at school depend on my life of prayer. When I am faithful to my daily prayer, when I enter deeply into what I say to Jesus, when I am open to Him, I work well in class, laziness at home comes to an end, and I manage to get along well with others. I can say that prayer has helped me to discover my identity as a child of God and the reason for my existence. When I live my life of prayer well, everything I do brings me joy; yet when I neglect my life of prayer, I am as if lost, nothing works anymore. And even when it does work, there is no deep joy and I feel empty.”

November 21, 2016

“My name is Sophie and I am 19 years old. It all began when I was in high school, in the 8th grade; as I was growing up, the boys started taking an interest in me. But that year, I did not give myself to them; on the contrary, I exploited them; I swindled their money and all the little things that young girls are crazy about. But as soon as a boy became too forward, I always managed to slip away, so as to somewhat follow my mother's advice, who said that this was reserved for grown-ups. To do all this I used lies; I had to lie about everything in order to convince people. I was an expert in false names; I had so many that I did not even recognize them all. All by myself I had a thousand and one addresses; I had discovered in myself the talents of an adventuress, because I got myself out of situations that were sometimes far-fetched, with a resourcefulness that, on reflection, baffled me. And the more the years passed, the more I hardened. At school, I gave my teachers a hard time. I skipped classes, or when I had no scheduled class I stayed in the classroom, but I spent my time causing disorder and disrupting the teacher. When I happened to be hungry or bored during a class, I would go find the supervisor and, between a few tears, I would successfully pretend to be sick or to have received bad news. My parents had no idea of my double life, since my hours of absence never showed up on the report card, and I made an effort to get good grades in class. My friends and I spent most of our time judging passers-by; we teased some by ridiculing their clothing, their gait. We did not hide the admiration that some provoked in us. Talking about people's names had already become part of my daily food ration. The following year, the elder brother of my friend came to shake me up when he was scandalized by the fact that I was still a virgin. He managed to make me feel ridiculous, and he also claimed that my friend and I were going to become sick if we kept stubbornly insisting on staying virgins. He did not manage to convince me completely. I kept resisting the temptation to follow the trend. Because all around me, my classmates, my friends, each one had a boyfriend. The breaks were punctuated with love stories. The atmosphere became such that it was with relief that I had my first lover. I gave myself to fornication; and for me it had become normal. During the vacation I nevertheless had to stop, because I no longer saw my boyfriend and I did not want any others. When school started again, I could no longer go to school for lack of financial means. This news outraged me; I was angry at the whole world; I even cursed God, and especially Him, it must be said. Every Sunday, while the others prayed, I brooded over my resentments against Him, and I said «I am at Mass and He dares to make me stay at home, and all that time I am going to lose, when I had already calculated my years of study and what I would become later.» If I kept going to Mass, it was because at home it was compulsory. One day, a sister invited me to a retreat day organized by the Word of God group. I was struck by the testimony of a girl who told how she had decided to stop fornication, and that for 3 years she had had the courage to be very frank with her boyfriend. It was that day that I learned that fornication was a sin before the Lord. I was so touched, overwhelmed, and full of shame that I wept for a long time during the sharing; I did not know what to say. From that day I made the resolution to follow the Lord and to stop fornication. But I could not keep my resolution for long, since a few months later I fell back into the trap of fornication with someone else who had demanded that we make love so that I would prove to him that I loved him and that I had no one but him. Having tried to convince him that fornication was not good and that it was a sin, he instead managed to shake me by saying that a normal person could not stay without sexual relations unless they belonged to a sect. And I, I continued to go to the meetings at the parish while committing fornication. Yet at every homily, every teaching, it was fornication that kept coming up. I had the impression that the priest or the person teaching knew what I was living. I had the idea of inviting him to the next retreat days, but he was quick to reject my invitation; he justified his attitude by saying that the people who go to church every day discourage him; he prefers to pray at home. So, after much reflection, I made the decision to begin to flee from him. During the retreat weekend where the theme was «I have chosen you, repair my Church», I had followed the story of a little girl who had chosen to die rather than accept fornication, so I made a very big decision: if it is I who am chosen to repair the Church of the Lord, then I must stop doing everything that does not please Him. That is how I spoke frankly with my boyfriend: «if you want to be my friend, either we stop fornicating or we make amends»; he thought I had another man, but I answered him that I had no one, but that I no longer wanted to offend my Jesus; so we separated, and I found peace. I do everything with the Lord, I try to practice His word. Everything that happens to me, I place it into His hands; everything wrong that I used to do before, I can no longer do, because there is in me the fear of God. Now I converse with the Lord as with a friend, and this helps me enormously to fight loneliness. I have noticed one thing in my life: it is that my physical and practical life depends on my prayer life. When I say physical life I mean my relationships with others; my activities at home and at school depend on my prayer life. When I am faithful to my daily prayer, when I enter deeply into what I say to Jesus, when I am open to Him, I work well in class, laziness at home comes to an end, and I manage to get along well with others. The concern to please Jesus gives meaning to my life, and I feel useful, and through His works in my everyday life I know that He is there beside me. I have learned to see everyone in the image of God and to no longer say just anything; I avoid hurting people, and I have much more respect for everyone. Of course I am still very far from being what Jesus truly wants of me; but every time I fall, I do not stay there. I get up, I cling to Him, and He never abandons me. I know one thing today: it is that my body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, so it must be respected.”

November 21, 2016

“I am a student at the faculty of medicine and biomedical sciences. I am 18 years old and the youngest in my family. Although initiated very early into the Christian life, my beginnings in faith were not impressive: I concretely made no effort to please Christ. Academically, I was doing well in the early years, mainly to please my parents and to receive the gifts they promised me. As I grew up, my center of interest shifted toward friends, games and especially television. This negatively influenced my year in the final year of primary school (CM2). I therefore sank into a deep laziness that grew worse in the 8th grade (4e). Because I had been separated from my friends and had made less good ones, because I had not personally chosen German as my second language, what little zeal I had left had faded away: I no longer worked, studies no longer interested me, and moreover, that year, in protest, the teachers had decided to “hand out” 20/20 grades to all the students. My schoolwork then became pitiful and my family was so disappointed by it. My older brothers addressed such sharp reproaches to me that I had to stop and reflect. It was not easy for me because I was almost a “slave to television.” It pushed me to be truly irresponsible at home, in my spiritual life and even in my schooling. As soon as a film began, I forgot myself. Mom could therefore no longer trust me. My studies took a big hit, precisely in 10th grade (2nde), where I had developed a not-very-clever study technique: I would take my notebook, fully determined to study, and I would sit down in front of the television! In the end, I watched more than I studied. Continuing on this course, the end of the year was catastrophic. After all these mistakes, I nevertheless ended up becoming aware of the importance I had to give to my studies. First because of my parents, who were a source of motivation for me, since it hurt me to disappoint them. I also benefited from the advice of my teachers and was strongly stimulated by understanding the interdependence between school life, spiritual life and family life. Thanks to the Word of God group, I understood that to please Jesus, I had to excel everywhere and thus be a model for my brothers and sisters, even through my schoolwork. I realized that by neglecting my studies, I was doing harm to Jesus and to myself. I also understood that, far from considering my studies a chore or a burden, I had to present them to God as an offering and seek holiness, even in this area of my life. I then began to cut off all my little idols: television, ill-timed distractions, laziness, sleep. I discipline my life so as to have a time for each thing, as Ecclesiastes tells us. I give priority to my study hours, I strive to review my lessons, to make note cards of them, to work with those who really want to work. It is true that sometimes the temptation is great and I really do not feel like cramming, but when I become aware of it, I pull myself together and pray to God to help me not give up. One truly loses nothing by taking one’s studies seriously; on the contrary, one has everything to gain from it. The Lord filled me with so many graces each time I truly gave myself, and did beyond my hopes. From the moment I became aware of it, I was first in my class until my final year (Terminale), I passed my Bepc, Probatoire and Bac C with good averages, and I received honor rolls and awards on several occasions at the school, and to crown it all, the Lord blessed me by giving me to succeed at the CUSS while being top of the entrance exam to the ENSP (Polytech, Editor’s note). I also became more responsible at home and my family is more and more proud of me. My commitment to the Group has intensified and intensifies from day to day, because I know that if we place our trust in the Lord and if we make a few sacrifices, the Lord will know how to multiply and make things bear fruit as he did with the 5 loaves and 2 fish of Lk 9:10-17.”

November 21, 2016

“I had always been a rebellious child. At home I was as stubborn as a mule. Until then, my spiritual life amounted to the baptism I had received as a baby, of which I had no memory whatsoever. My first communion at the age of seven had been an occasion to parade in front of my friends and to have a lovely celebration. All of that was far from the piety and maturity of a Saint Thérèse of the Child Jesus on the day of her first communion. My prayer amounted to making the sign of the cross at bedtime; and as for Mass, I would not have missed it for anything in the world; it was the ideal rendezvous for meeting my friends or making new ones under the cover of the sign of peace we exchanged at church. My parents were in despair. I broke the household taboos by systematically refusing to help my mother in the kitchen. I would regularly lock myself in my room, devouring piles of Harlequin romances, detective novels and others even more daring, which presented life and the world to me as I would have wished them for myself. I did not hide my anger when anyone dared to send me on an errand; I insulted everyone shamelessly, and I did not hesitate to play Jean-Claude Van Damme by fighting vigorously with anyone who dared raise their voice at me. My big sister was my favourite victim, and my little brother lost a tooth to me. The hatred that everyone seemed to feel towards me surprised no one. I was the rebel and the loner. I had become bulimic, and from eating too much I had put on a lot of weight. "My enemies" did not spare me. At home they called me "the mass". And all the compliments I could receive were merely: "you are stupid", "you are so clumsy", etc. Outside, it was hardly any better. I had all sorts of complexes and I felt rejected by everyone. The light of my baptism seemed to have gone out, and I suffered from it without being able to realise where my affliction came from; I went from blunder to blunder. I received an invitation to a Word of God youth retreat; without really knowing why, I accepted to go. That day, I could not hold back my tears after the teachings. My gaze seemed to lose itself in that of Jesus, whom I was discovering through all these teachings. He knew me so well, and above all He did not judge me but welcomed me, He who had never abandoned me. My past no longer existed. I felt loved and ready to reconcile with everyone. I resolved to begin a new life, to live at last; I who until then had merely existed, for there is no life apart from the One who is Life. My efforts to please Jesus did not go unnoticed. I stopped reading all the material that unbalanced me psychologically by promoting sin in a subtle and discreet way. At school my academic work underwent a complete turnaround; from a somewhat lazy pupil, I became the best student in my class by working very hard. In this way I wanted to please Jesus by pleasing my parents; and then, I became ambitious, insofar as I want to have a good job later on and thus be able to help others who are less fortunate. At home, my parents have become my friends and my confidants. I do not hesitate to help my mother in the kitchen when I go on holiday. Obeying even when it costs me has become for me a way of pleasing Jesus, and the intercession of His mother has always been a remarkable support in my life. Today I strive to share with other young people the wonderful experience of a life with Christ, and I am proud of my parents.”

November 21, 2016

“My name is Rose. When I sat down, I could not easily get back up. During the Word of God retreat in Bamenda, I experienced a deliverance. Since the great retreat, everything has been fine, to the point that I was able to kneel for more than 30 minutes during the Easter retreat, which was impossible for me before. On my return from that same retreat, I experienced a deliverance: I suffered from a pain under the left rib cage that could not be cured at the hospital for more than 10 years. At one point during the retreat, I felt something roll in my belly as if it were a child moving inside me; the movements were so palpable that I thought if I lifted my clothing I would see it move, but no! Now, this pain has partly disappeared, and I am convinced that it will go away completely with time. Thank you, Lord.”

November 21, 2016

“I am 38 years old, I am the mother of four children, a teacher by profession. The loss of my husband was one of the most painful events of my life. Raised in a family for whom Sunday Mass was obligatory, it was only natural that after my marriage I continued to go, having myself accompanied by my husband, who followed me without complaint. Only, without any explanation, we both stopped going, making brief appearances at the great feasts such as Christmas or Easter. Notions such as listening to the Word of God and reading the Bible had become completely foreign to me. My Bible had become a decoration for my filing shelf, and when I forgot to dust that spot, it would be covered with dust. Having no spiritual reference point left, I led my life as I pleased, having no account of conscience to render to anyone. That is when the black list began. My brother-in-law drowned in a river. His death, which people hastened to declare mystical, drew us into the world of witch doctors. Before the burial, which took place the next day, we had already had time to consult all the great witch doctors of the village. They were all unanimous: “He is not dead; he has been chained. If you do not react like capable men, you are going to lose him.” We did not hesitate to spend staggering sums, but to our great despair the dead man remained inert until his interment. A year after this event, both of my husband's feet began to swell. The idea of going to consult a doctor did not cross our minds for a moment; obviously we had to run to a witch doctor. “You crossed a remedy that was not meant for you, otherwise you would already be dead; the ‘son’ was cast upon you,” and so on. We had to pour out at that place 100,000 francs and a large goat for the protective charm. This treatment changed nothing. We went from healer to healer, and my husband grew less and less well. Everywhere they tried to convince us that this was not a case that could be solved at the hospital. Yet, the one time we finally decided to take him to the hospital, after the tests, we discovered that he had cancer. We continued to bring the witch doctors discreetly to the hospital. And undoing the dressing done by the nurses, they would redo their own in their own way. We could not imagine an outcome without the unparalleled help of the witch doctors. They took advantage of our already largely shattered morale to ruin us. But what would we not have given for my husband to survive? Meanwhile he was transferred to the Laquintinie Hospital in Douala, Cameroon. His cancer had spread throughout his body. The doctors did not judge it useful to admit him. He would go to the hospital for treatment. This life in the neighbourhood created even greater disorder with the consultation of the witch doctors who came to see him; sometimes there were two a day, and there were times when they did not even hesitate to squabble among themselves, each considering himself the strongest. It was in these deplorable and how bitter conditions that my husband died. I felt deceived, humiliated, mocked, plundered, ruined by the witch doctors. Until the very end my hope had rested only in them. I had been certain of their power to save my husband. The money spent at the hospital did not amount to a quarter of what I had given them. I found myself riddled with debts, dreading the gaze of my creditors. I felt a surge of hatred come over me for the witch doctors; I judged them responsible for my downfall. When my mother tried to convince me to go and consult yet another witch doctor whom she knew and whose praises were sung everywhere, I violently opposed it. She resolved to go alone, persuaded that I was losing “my chance.” Later she confessed to me that she had been swindled by him. As for me, I no longer knew what to do with my life; having drifted away from my God long ago, I no longer knew how to address Him, especially after all the blunders of my life. Yet I began to read spiritual books such as “The Power of Praise,” which reinvigorated my spiritual interest. Invited to a Word of God retreat, I was overwhelmed by the songs, which seemed to express my soul and reveal it. The song “Be converted, it is not too late” was like a spark within me. I decided to grow in my relationship with God, and to help others to go and meet Him. The sacraments became a source of great consolation for me. I was healed of my hatred of the witch doctors; today I pray for them, so that they too may be enlightened by the Light of Jesus. Whatever the storms of my life, I know today that everything depends on God, and that He is the only Almighty.”

November 21, 2016

“1. I am an agronomist by training. I have been married for 3 years, 2 months and 6 days before God and men. We have 2 children; a girl and a boy. Before getting married, the dreams of happiness I had regarding my partner's good conduct were the following: - A woman who is educated, submissive, gentle and composed; - A hardworking woman; - A woman who would be able to satisfy my libidinal instincts, available at any time. 2. During the engagement, since we did not live in the same city, I liked to send her text messages and make nighttime calls because 8 minutes cost only 100 F. When I had the chance to travel to Douala, where she lived and was pursuing her studies, I did not hesitate to do so, and on those occasions we would spend whole days together in her student room chatting between us. We always liked to stay, and since it is hot in Douala, we would lie down on the floor rather than on the bed, even if nothing happened in the end. At the beginning of the marriage, I liked to give her the 'silent treatment' when I came home, since during the celebration of our wedding and after we had kissed, the celebrant argued, saying "you have the green light from now on to kiss publicly." 3. But it was not always rosy. When we went through times of trouble, in order to annoy or upset my wife, I had the habit of shutting her down every time she brought me serious matters, and especially when my pockets were empty. I know that this must make her uncomfortable because she likes to be listened to. Sometimes, I come home after nightfall when we are in disagreement, and this is to amplify her annoyance, because she likes to see me at her side at all times and before nightfall. 4. What allowed me to understand that I had to love her more and according to God's plan, and to grow in my love for her, is the fact that through the exercises of the Word of God prayer sheet, I discovered that getting angry was a sin, and therefore it was I who led her to be in disagreement with Christ. And moreover, I gain nothing by making her suffer, for during moments of tension in our marriage, it is love that deteriorates and does us more harm than good. 5. What I do to please her: at least once a month, I take her to eat grilled pork, preferably with hot bread from the Boulangerie la Grâce, which she loves so much. I also accompany her to do her shopping without asking questions and without becoming impatient. When I am available, wherever she goes in the city I accompany her. Just recently, I discovered that she liked to go for walks, and since then, as soon as I find free time on Sundays, I do not hesitate to take her to discover the different neighborhoods of the city. Knowing that she likes to eat hot bread, when I have the chance to buy some in the evening on my way home from work I always do. To love her even more, every morning when I can, I either wash the diapers and other clothes, both the baby's and our own, or I get the child ready along with his school snack, and I bathe the baby and dress him. And this has been so ever since we had children. To always love her, I accompany her every Thursday to the Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament because she likes it when we go there together, as well as to Masses, and we must sit together. 6. As no work can be done without difficulties, I often find myself discouraged from pleasing her when she loses control of herself by scolding and hitting the children, by leaving the house in disorder, by ruining the cooking of the meals, and above all and above all by disobeying me. To overcome these difficulties and persevere, I always pray for us, I invite her to a face-to-face confrontation for one-on-one talks in order to speak about it and clear things up. And even sometimes when it persists, I am obliged to fix what was wrong by myself to teach her a lesson. To persevere, I think about and meditate on the words of Cardinal Christian TUMI during an interview in which he invited married couples to "strive to develop and cultivate as best they can the capacity to love their partner." 7. For me, the fruits of my efforts to please my wife are manifold: she hides nothing from me, she always confides in me, gives me advice on managing our resources, on maintaining our fraternal, friendly and even professional relationships. I can say without fear of being mistaken that I am her only friend and confidant. These fruits even extend into my family, both nuclear and extended. Thus she takes care of everyone in the family, sympathizes with and shares in the difficulties of everyone around us. She always makes sure that we assist people in difficult situations as well as happy ones. Whenever I have to go to the village, she never fails to prepare a package for my mother, and she usually calls her on the phone, as well as my brothers and sisters, to greet them. In short, it is she who enlightens me on many things. 8. My dearest desire is that nothing prevent me from continuing to grow in pleasing my wife, and in my prayers I never cease to entrust this to the Lord. 9. In view of all this, I can only ask married couples to please their partner, for pleasing our wives is doing the will of God. And one should wish that their holiness may come about through our love for them.”

November 21, 2016

“I am married, a seamstress. I began to understand the need to give my life to Christ a few years before our marriage. So I kept asking God to give me a very devout husband, one who could help me to rise up again if ever I grew weak. The one I would never regret having married, very handsome, cute, and with plenty of money. It should be noted that if priests could marry, I would have asked Jesus to give me a priest for a husband. Since I dreamed of a husband very close to God, why not Saint Peter (the pope). During our engagement, I never stopped reminding him that I loved him and that I kissed him very tenderly each time we spoke on the phone, for we were not in the same city. And I told myself that once we were married, I would give myself to him whenever we both wished, and that I should be very attentive to him, always smiling, and above all prompt to serve him. This so as to express to him my sincere and true love. Unfortunately, very soon I conceived, I was ill, the pregnancy threatened me so much that I could think only of the child I was carrying. So I began to reject him, to the point that when he needed me, I would push him away, saying “I don't feel well.” After the pregnancy came the delivery. During the delivery of our first child, I had second-degree tears. So I made the effort to keep myself reserved for 8 months after the delivery before offering myself again to my husband; thus he strove to live chastity despite his pearl who was nonetheless right beside him. As a little aside, one day my husband made me angry, and to irritate him in turn, I locked the bedroom door, and he spent the night in the living room without a blanket, and the cold got to him well and good. Because I had to make him pay for it. Another time also, he irritated me to the point that I wanted to whip him, and since I could not, I went into the bedroom to take the key to his office, thinking it was the key to the motorbike, which I kept. Since it was the weekend, on Monday morning he searched so hard for it without finding it, and asked me nothing about it. Unfortunately for him that day, his boss arrived at the office first and did not find him there. He called him, and when he came to say that he could not find the office keys, his boss got seriously angry with him. In the evening, he came home very upset, and that is when he asked whether we had not seen his keys in the house. So I started to laugh and told him to check whether they were not in the bag of clothes lying on the floor. He took them while staring at me and did not know what to say. Thanks to the teachings I receive at the Word of God group, and even more to those I received last year during the specific teaching at the great retreat, which invited me to support my husband better, to take good care of him and to make as many gestures of love as possible to show him that I love him. Thus, I became more and more gentle with my dear husband. I got into the habit of calling him by his pet name “darling,” everywhere, even in front of anyone. I make the effort to keep our bed always made and the sheets clean. I make sure that the meal is well prepared, and my main concern is that he always enjoy my meals, even though he is very demanding. It should be noted that, contrary to before, I would not take the trouble to set aside my husband's meal before leaving the house in the mornings, but now I do it almost every time, since he comes home at noon when he has worked in the town. As for my underwear, I always keep it clean and attractive. I see to it that he always says his personal prayer in the morning. When I suspect he has not done it, I ask him and, if need be, remind him. When he has to travel on the weekend, I always ask him how he will manage Sunday Mass, and when he is back, I make sure whether he did it or not. When I notice that his underwear is no longer in good shape, I renew it. All of this does not happen without difficulty. There is, for example, the matter of finances. You really want to please your husband, but you find yourself without money. Sometimes I feel like getting discouraged, telling myself that it is too hard to always be seeking to please one's darling. I would say that these efforts to always please him make us very happy. We flourish sufficiently despite our limited financial means. My husband is not only my spouse, but also my confidant, so everything to me. When he is not at work, we are together. He does almost nothing without my knowing about it. Love truly reigns in our home. I know my man. I remember one time when I was complaining so much about money problems, knowing how much he earns a month, he proposed that from then on he would take his salary and hand it over to me so that I myself could manage it as I wished. I answered with a curt ‘no,' because I know inwardly that our needs and problems are always beyond his income, and when he manages it as a man he will know how to provide for our needs, and that is what he strives to do. Apart from the days when one of us is prevented or not in the town on Sundays, we always go and come back together from Mass. In my family, all those for whom I have esteem, my husband esteems just as much. As for our life of prayer, we say our family prayer together in the evening with the children. So far I would say that I have not even yet begun to love him truly as Christ and I myself would want. For that, I never stop praying and entrusting to Jesus this ardent desire to please him and to put at ease all those who visit us, so as to honor that prayer the celebrant said on the day of our wedding, which I quote: “May their home be fruitful and welcoming to all who enter it.” This prayer has remained engraved in my memory to this day, and each time I pray and ask Jesus to bless our house so that all who enter it feel happy, even if we give them nothing. So, dear brothers and sisters, we invite you to do as we do. Make small gestures of love toward your partner so that a pleasant atmosphere may reign among you, and finally to help him grow in his love for God. All who love will flourish…”

November 21, 2016

“My name is Marie, In my family we went to Mass on solemnities or great feasts, Christmas, Easter... I did not grow up with my parents; at my birth, my uncle (my mother's younger brother), out of gratitude for what my parents had done for him, decided to take me in at a year and a half. I was still breastfeeding. I grew up with them and their daughter in Yaoundé. On the occasion of a divorce, he remarried a woman from "our home village", whom my mother went to fetch in the village. That was the beginning of the descent into hell. I was six and a half. My misfortune came from the fact that my uncle (may his soul rest in peace), an agricultural engineer of the time, ran State projects; he was always travelling, very often for months. Every time he left, I was abandoned to myself; my nanny only looked after her own children. It was I who got the badly kept food that was already going mouldy, to the point where I caught amoebic dysentery that nearly cost me my life. I spent the nights beside my cousin's cradle so that, when she woke, I would rock her at once while her mother slept. The housemaid was always entitled to a temporary cessation of duties, and I had to do the bulk of the household chores. I walked to school even though there was a driver. I was eight and a half when I spent evenings and weekends outside with the neighbourhood children and only came home to sleep if I had the chance. I grew up in the street under the electricity poles. Our main activity was gathering locusts that we would go and grill at the home of one of them. In the street you had to fight to have a place and not let yourself be trampled on, so I learned and developed physical and verbal violence, hatred, resentment, lying, selfishness, etc. We were constantly fighting in the street, with weapons if need be (stick, stone, knives, nails, screwdrivers...). I rehearsed insults, alone in my room. At the same time, at school I systematically repeated every grade. After many family problems, my mother decided to take me back at 12; I was in CM1 (Year 5). Back at my parents' home in Douala, it was very difficult because my father had undertaken to set me straight. But the ground was not favourable. Old habits die hard.... I had 2 faces: at home, I played the docile and obedient child, but at school it was I who set up the appointments to fight on the grass on Fridays, either to avenge myself or to avenge my classmates. They called me firefighter. All my classmates were afraid of me… I did not love my father, I found him mean. It was then that my sister, the eldest of the family, whom I affectionately call Mamado, decided to take me in at Nkongsamba at 13 and a half. A decisive turning point had begun. The upbringing and the environment had changed considerably. A few months later, to everyone's surprise, I passed the entrance exam for Form One (sixième) at the Sainte Jeanne d'Arc college. When my results were announced, the family made the trip to the college to check, so much was I considered hopeless and good for nothing. Against all expectation, I produced nothing but good results, with a school bursary of 9,000 F for the first cycle and 10,000 F for the second cycle, in addition to the college's best award in Spanish in the first year (première/Lower Sixth). I never again knew academic failure, right up to university and to my graduation from the ENS/Yaoundé (Higher Teacher Training College), and yet my sister used many tricks and juggling acts to pay my school fees and safeguard my household. It was also during my stay in Nkongsamba that I received all my sacraments. However, I had not given up violence, to the point that while at the ENS I nearly killed my cousin, who had stood up to me, with my big pair of scissors. Fortunately, my friends who were there caught the scissors in mid-flight. I would have been in prison. I took the opportunity to remind her of all the miseries her mother had inflicted on me. It flowed like water. She cried a great deal. Violence was still my favourite dish and resentment my dessert. I gnashed my teeth a great deal when I missed the chance to do harm. I was forever making faces of displeasure...... This had repercussions in my household, with my husband and the children. I would always plug in the iron to apply it to him as soon as we had a quarrel. Knowing me, he always kept a safe distance. Another time, as I chased him with the knife, the door handle wounded him in the stomach. The scar is still there... He does not see very well with his left eye because I had poured hot pépé-soupe sauce right in his face, even though he was the one who had given it to me. Sometimes I would wait for him with the machete; when I scrape it on the cement, at the sight of the sparks he disappears very quickly and I am pleased. In the same vein, my daughter ran away at 9. I had just struck her hard with a large wooden spatula. Her fingers swelled. She told me later that as she was leaving, she kept turning round, hoping I would follow her. I did not move. She wondered whether I was really her mother. Meanwhile, my Christian life was between two large parentheses. I no longer went to church at all. After reproaches from my mother and my father, I returned to the Catholic Church, because I was already flirting with the Jehovah's Witnesses. I opted for the anticipated Saturday Masses and, much later, more regularly for the 8 a.m. Masses. The Lord was calling me progressively. That is how a sister asked me to join them for the care of the little ones, and there I was in the Holy Innocents group. This sister gave me the Word of God leaflets, which I did not read. Come on! When the group opened at Saint Louis, I arrived 2 and a half months later, after an assiduous courtship by our sister who kept praising the teachings to me. I was very moved at the first meeting. I had, so to speak, begun my deliverance. The teachings edified me greatly; every Monday evening, I called myself into question. I made my examination of conscience and in my heart, quietly, I saw how wretched I was. Because every time I read the Bible, it spoke only of mercy, tenderness, gentleness, love, etc... So I resolved to change. But deep within me, it was not always so. I now had to force myself to be gentle and to love the other. The liberation was gradual. The final phase came about following a teaching at a day of retreat. This teaching was about tenderness; what touched me was the example she gave concerning a comparative study by the sisters of 2 groups of children. Group A was raised in gentleness, tenderness, gifts and every form of affection, and the children were receptive, open, obedient, intelligent. Group B, raised in every form of brutality, ill-treatment, bullying, etc... produced poor school results; these children were introverted, of very little intelligence, unsociable and very little obedient." She ended by saying that one reaps only what one has sown". I had the impression that someone had told her about my childhood. Fortunately, those around me noticed my development. Some time ago, my daughter got a bad mark in mathematics. She told me, all trembling, certain that I was going to "plunder" her (those were my expressions). To my great surprise, we discussed her difficulties calmly and at the end I told her that whatever happens she should know that "mummy loves you." This sentence set something off in her. She became more fulfilled and more open. I am now more often surrounded by children. Last year my colleagues nicknamed me the dispenser of good humour; on entering an office, I always found a sentence or a biblical passage to give them joy and hope, especially when we have "pocket ailments" (money troubles). Several of my friends said to me: "my word, old age is handling you well", already because, faced with a situation, instead of adding oil to the fire, I now only calm things down. My husband is the one who has reaped the most fruits of the conversion. Because I have become calmer and I listen to him when he speaks. Before, when he said "A" I was already at "Z". (He even often asks me: have you nothing to say?) In return, he has become madly in love again, and the steamy love texts (love SMS) are pouring down once more. To make this concrete, on returning from the school holidays in September 2011, he himself proposed that I meet the parish priest for the formalities of our religious marriage — he who had sworn that for nothing in the world could he accept it [a reason that had nearly separated us] — there he was, committed. The wedding was celebrated on 9 December 2011 at 10 a.m. It was very moving, sober and extraordinary. There were 12 people in all, including the celebrant and the sacristan. It is now he who reminds me that I will be late for the group. Aren't you going to Church today? He knows my Mass schedule well and appreciates the company of my sisters from the group. My prayer life has changed a great deal. I pray everywhere and entrust every situation to God. I live almost all of the exercises on the leaflet. I sell the leaflets by calling out after Masses. I share the testimonies at the group. At the office I instituted the workers' prayer with Radio Veritas (the diocesan radio) on Mondays at 8:05 a.m. to entrust the working week. We also have the Jesus-breaks at midday to regain strength, especially when we are not out in the field. Since I reconnected with the body of Christ, the moment of communion is always very charged with emotion, and Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament is one of my favourite exercises. I always attend the day of retreat and I make an effort to greet as many people as possible and to serve. I bless the Lord every day, he who used my sisters to call me. If I have to compare the periods, I would say that I was blind and now I am one-eyed. At this very hour, I want to speak like the apostle Paul: "Nothing can separate me from the love of God"… I encourage us to do good and to be gentle and tender. Does the Word of God not say « Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth » Mt 5:4: [I pray to forgive my nanny] May the Lord grant me this grace. My brothers and sisters, we have held on well, so let us not give up. Union of Prayer”

November 21, 2016

“A young mathematics student who, despite her tight schedule, nevertheless manages to grow in her intimacy with Jesus, by reading the Bible a great deal, the lives of the saints, by going regularly to the adoration of the Most Blessed Sacrament, always taking part in the rehearsals for the on-stage evangelization and the decoration. These sacrifices for the group's activities draw mockery from her classmates, but she holds firm, to the point of sacrificing taxi money for the benefit of the group's activities. What is more, she preferred to come to the Lenten retreat in Douala instead of using that money to buy her clothes.”

November 21, 2016

“Hello everyone, my name is Carine Yonga. I live in Nice in the South of France. This year, the feast of Christmas is placed for me under the sign of thanksgiving. Yes, thanksgiving for all the blessings received from God, for the many successes and above all for his constant protection over my life. Years ago, I did not really know how to prepare for the feast of Christmas and how to live the season of Advent. I noticed that during this liturgical season there was no longer a Gloria at Mass and that the liturgical color was violet, as during Lent. When young, we had learned this hymn "O come, Emmanuel, come among us, come and save us" and other hymns as well that gave rhythm to this liturgical season in the parishes in Cameroon. Although I was a member of the Word of God group, I maintained a rather routine life at the personal level in every respect during this season. Once I had left Cameroon, I no longer have an exact memory of how I lived my first seasons of Advent. One thing I do remember, however, is finding myself one day at the Galeries Lafayette as Christmas approached. I did not have much money and I was certainly looking for small gifts... The lady in front of me at the checkout put through her purchases and paid for them directly with her credit card for more than 2000 euros! My eyes widened. 2000 Euros, just for Christmas shopping; the automatic CFA converter starting up in my brain confirmed to me that the purchases exceeded one million CFA francs. It shocked me but also made me reflect on the feast of Christmas. Statistics say that the French will spend on average 512 euros per household for the Christmas feast this year, not counting the gifts perhaps. The first gift that I can give to Jesus but also to those I love is indeed to prepare well for his COMING, for Advent comes from the Latin "adventus" which means COMING. This is how, for about 3 years now, the novena for the difficulties of the members of the group is the first event that helps me enter into Advent. This year I tried to apply myself to it as best I could, to pray for others but also for myself. It was a way for me to begin "to prepare the way of the Lord" Luke 3:10-11. I was also very happy when brother Henri spoke about the nativity scene. For several years now I have been preparing a nativity scene for Christmas. At first it was to break with the solitude and the distance from my family during Christmas. Now the nativity scene is much more for me. It is an icon and a source of warmth in the house during Christmas. It is as if I had the chance to be visited by Jesus in his complete humility. It is also an invitation to adore him like the Magi: "we have seen his star in the East and have come to adore him" Mt 2:2. In general there is always a lot of coming and going at home during that period. The nativity scene, replacing the traditional Christmas tree, is also a testimony of my Christian faith in the sense that it can be the starting point or the occasion to speak of God to a non-Christian friend who is visiting. Christmas is the feast of Lights; during Advent, all the lights are hung up little by little in the city. I really like the Christmas decorations, but the true light that gives meaning to all these worldly lights is indeed Jesus! He says it himself: "I am the light of the world; whoever follows me does not walk in the night..." John 8:12. During this time of Advent it is an invitation for me to drive out the darkness in my life and to fall back into step with Jesus, notably in intimate prayer but also in the adoration that I have often neglected recently. I also met with my priest for confession and I am awaiting his appointment. I often talk a lot and I can hurt people inadvertently. I realize it afterwards but each time it is too late. I am not always very calm at the wheel and sometimes I get angry or let out an insult at a driver who does foolish things on the road. An exercise that I am living during this time of Advent, in order to receive an interior light and to be able to share it on Christmas Day, is truly to hold my tongue and to speak only measured and considered words. It is an exercise that costs me a great deal and I sometimes am not very proud in the evening when reviewing my day, but I also see the work of the Holy Spirit who is progressively shaping me. "Produce the acts that show that you have changed your behavior" Mt 3:8. When the disciples received John's baptism and asked him what should be done, John answered them, "let whoever has two tunics share with the one who has none." Luke 3:11. To live out love, I planned a few acts to carry out by giving my time and my money. To please Jesus and to live out Love, I am going to contribute financially to the shopping and go cook at the soup kitchen a few days before Christmas. It will be the Christmas meal for the homeless. They are expecting hundreds of people and need volunteers. Also, on Christmas evening my little family and I will join the parish meal where we have invited all the people of the neighborhood (elderly or not) who are alone and those who sleep in the street. I also do not hesitate to make small spontaneous gestures of love and also to be love in my prayer, notably by interceding even more for the brothers and sisters and for the Church in distress (Iraq, for example). Another important point is the intensifying of the living out of the exercises on the prayer sheet. Thanks to a testimony on the tithe, I also understood that it is important to be up to date in one's contributions during this time of Advent. At this very moment I am striving to gather together my debts toward the Lord, whether it be the church offering or my contributions to the group. As my Bible is growing old, I have also planned, thanks to my tithe, to obtain the ecumenical TOB Bible, 2010 version, which has just been published with the additional books of the Orthodox Church. Christmas will certainly be a very beautiful feast this year. I bless the Lord for inviting me to this feast, but I do not forget his mother Mary whom I pray to regularly and whose intercession is precious to me. Thank you Mother Mary for giving us your son who comes to dwell with us. As Isaiah once did to King Ahaz, the Lord gives us a sign in this time of Advent: "If you do not believe, you will not stand firm... Behold, the virgin is with child and will bring into the world a son. Emmanuel: 'God with Us'" Isaiah 7:9, 14. Merry Christmas in advance to all!”

November 21, 2016

“A young teacher who had been assigned to a secondary school about 35 minutes from Yaoundé (Cameroon) was experiencing enormous difficulties in view of the salary conditions (very low), the commute, and even the teaching itself. All of this disgusted him, and so he became often absent; handing in the marked assignments late; no longer wanting to teach at all or to make a career of it. Fortunately, during a retreat day, on a third Sunday, during spiritual accompaniment, he understood that God was calling him to do his work well in his school. He resolved to change and thus became diligent while delivering his classes well, to the point of being appreciated by his pupils. Moreover, he no longer hides his Christian identity, and he speaks of God to his colleagues. This diligence and the results of his pupils earned him the award for the third best teacher of the year.”

November 21, 2016